Last Word Audio © 2013

​Last Word Audio

Eddie Long plans to be a country music star but he's stuck touring the college frat circuit. But after his nagging wife apparently dies at the hands of a serial killer, Eddie writes the best song of his life and it goes straight to number one.

Eddie's friend, freelance writer Jimmy Rogers, senses a great opportunity and sets out to write the life story of Nashville's newest sensation. But Jimmy's research unearths some troubling facts about the death of Eddie's wife, facts that could ruin Eddie's burgeoning career -- while making Jimmy a star of the publishing world.

Throw in a beautiful and opportunistic country radio DJ, a pair of wily record producers, and a naive young singer-songwriter, and the stage is set. Everybody plans to make a killing -- one way or another. It's murder on Music Row, where things don't always turn out as planned.

Think of it as “A Star is Born” crossed with “Fargo,” set in Nashville.

For over a decade, Michelle Slatalla wrote drolly about everything from online shopping to gorilla shoes, in the Style pages of the New York Times. Equal parts Erma Bombeck and Jean Kerr, with just a dash of Shirley Jackson, she peered into every corner of her life—then investigated her three daughters, husband and and her dogs, mainly because she needed the money. Now the editor and founder of the immensely popular blog, Gardenista, she needs the money more than ever. Hence this compendium of never-told anecdotes about her life in Northern California.

Mr. Jonathan Chambers senses that something is very wrong. The walk he takes every night is suddenly, slightly shorter. All around him things are vanishing. Is it because of the recent war or famine in the world? Does the scandalous theory that cost him his job hold the key? Or is it just the slowly unhinging mind of a recluse?

The year is 1938, after the Fall of San Francisco, and Captain Lance and his squadron, The Werewolves of War, are America’s last-best hope against the disintegrating flame and acid bullets of the United Slav Army. It will take luck, guts, and some fancy flying to carry out The Torpedo Plan, foil the enemy spies, and win freedom and glory for America in this science-fiction pulp-adventure classic.

Joe Odin is the world's greatest guesser, a carnival legend who can tell you your weight, your profession, or your favorite brand of whiskey with nothing but a glance and a grubby dollar. He uses his flamboyant style of deduction to peer into small-town secrets and unravel his favorite puzzles of all... murders. Primrose Whistler is just seventeen years old, a trailer park firecracker with green hair and a talent for trouble. After she witnesses a brutal attack and is almost killed at the county fair, she and Odin forge an unlikely partnership of razor-sharp wits and masterful deduction to stop a killer before he silences Prim for good.

Big-shot ad exec Dan Steele feels entitled to the best life has to offer - even if he has to live way beyond his means to acquire it. But there's hope on the horizon. Dan has just stolen what's sure to be an award-winning idea for a multimillion-dollar account. If he can keep the creditors at bay long enough, he'll get the keys to the executive restroom and all his problems will be solved.

Unfortunately, that's when his brother, a Catholic priest, shows up at Dan's door in need of a loan to pay for some essential medical attention. Being financially and morally challenged, Dan hands over his insurance card instead of his credit card. But it's too late. After running up a bill for $300,000, Father Michael goes the way of all flesh.

Now Dan has a choice: go to prison for insurance fraud or take a vow of poverty and become a man of the cloth. Before he can say, "God bless," Dan finds himself pursued by a relentless insurance investigator, the psychopathic copywriter whose idea he stole, and a deadly killer from his brother's mysterious past. And, as if that wasn't enough, Dan finds himself falling in love with a gun-toting nun. Let us pray.

Bob Dillon is a down-on-his-luck exterminator from Queens who just wants to make a killing with his radical new environmentally friendly pest elimination technique, involving his hybrid assassin bugs (a very real group of insects). But when Bob decides to advertise, his flyer falls into the hands of a European murder-for-hire broker who mistakes Bob for a professional assassin. Before he knows it, Bob's "competition" targets him for extermination, sending him running for his life from a motley collection of the world's deadliest and most outrageously eccentric contract killers.